No ovulation. WTF. Totally positive opk, massive amounts of perfectly timed BD'ing and my body fails me, as it does every month. Is it possible to gear up to O and not actually O? yes. why? WHY would your body do that. I guess I
could have O'd but my temps are still kind of low and in the pre-o range so I'm guessing I didn't. I'm exhausted. The hubby is going to do his s/a
on Wednesday on March 1st--he has to go in for a new patient consult since he hasn't been in 5 years and
then they will schedule an analysis. We only have ONE urologist in the TWO counties we live/work in. Doesn't anyone go to school to be a urologist anymore?
I'm calling I called a new RE today to set up an appointment so we can do the IUI cycle as soon as possible. This RE is in the same area but the cost is a little better, as far as I'm concerned, the cost doesn't matter anymore.The hubby thinks otherwise, his exact words "where are you going to come up with $1,500.00?" (insert awkward silence here) I wish I had an answer. I'll do whatever I have to do to get this baby and pray that god has my back. It's hard when money controls destiny. Money will get me the IUI, not fate. I've been waiting 18 months for 'fate' to take over, get at me, fate! Lily's getting older by the day, we wanted her and her sibling two and a half years apart (give or take), we'll be working on almost FOUR years now. I don't want her to remember a time when it was just her, I want her to have always known she grew up with a sibling. Obviously I have ZERO control over this and you can't plan things like this, well
I can't anyway, my ovaries are that of an 80 year old woman apparently. The hubby's response to this "Who cares if they are four years apart?" (insert another awkward silence) I do, me. I care. No, the IUI isn't guaranteed but the chances are a HELL of a lot better. They use medication to grow nice, big follicles, injectables to trigger ovulation and place the best swimmers directly IN the uterus at the time of ovulation, bypassing any cervical mucus issues and any issues my cervix may have from my CKC surgery. I wish I could be as not as concerned about this as my hubby but its just not me. We're all getting older, my uterus is getting lonelier, my cervix is jacked up and maybe this is when I have to let go. If we can't afford IUI there is now way we'd ever be able to do IVF, so my only option? opk's, temping, bd'ing and praying. That's it.
The Potty Training Chronicles
Potty training, check. Yes, this kid potty trained over the weekend, she amazes me! Friday and Saturday we did the pull up/panties combo, the panties were great for letting her know she peed, the pull ups I could still do without, however they are nice on-the-go. Sunday she went commando the whole day and had NO accidents, zero! She would be playing, would realize she had to go, go to her potty, sit down and do her thing! We went to dinner that evening so obviously we had to put a pull up on her, a little nudie probably isn't acceptable in a restaurant not to mention unsanitary. Anyway, she told me in the middle of dinner that she had to go, so we used the big, gross public restroom at Country Cookin' for the first time, and she went, she held it and went and made it home with a dry pull up! Success! I'm so excited for her, however I loved the convenience of diapers, never had to worry when we're in the back of the store with a cart full of groceries if she had to pee but whatever, that cart will be there when we're done (hopefully!) My little pixie is no longer a baby, she's a little girl.
Oh and Happy Valentine's Day!--just another infertile day for me. Hopefully, at least, I won't have to cook dinner! I will however, enjoy these delicious cupcakes and cookies my boss brought in, I may just eat them ALL!
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