junk of the heart

I love September. The evenings are a little cooler, the jackets are a little warmer and the run around pace of summer, simmers down. You pack away the red, white and blue and welcome the wine reds and harvest yellows. Sundays consist of burgandy & gold, world famous nachos and football on the big screen. Pumpkin spice and apple cider replace Tahitian winds and watermelon.  My favorite cooking spices line the cupboards and the baking pans move closer to the front of the cabinets. The moments when its summer in the sun and winter in the shade.  Knowing that the holidays are just around the bend. I've made a goal to have more gatherings, invite more people over, enjoy the company of the people that we love the most. Big dinners and candles at the dining room table, or just subs and fries while being crammed together at the small kitchen table. I was acknowledged by my boss with a really sweet card and $100 bonus and we ended up spending every dime in one night on dinner and drinks with friends. I had intended on buying shoes or a new fall purse and my husband said, "I think spending the money on memories is better than a pair of shoes, don't you?" And when you look at it like that, its not just dinner and drinks, it is memories and memories, unlike shoes, you will have forever.

Lily's been on this "when I grow up" kick. Anything we tell her she's good at, she wants to be that when she grows up. "You are a fast kicker!" "I'm going to be a fast kicker when I grow up!" same scenario with soccer player, princess, drawer (artist of some sort I'm assuming), swimmer, doctor (I do like the ring to that one!) and dancer. I love that the possibilities for her are endless and that she has the drive to be something, do something, even if she's too young to realize what it entails, she knows she's going to be, something. I'm not sure when we lose that drive, when we settle for the monotony of the day to day. Maybe money hinders us, or certain life decisions, maybe we don't like change as much as we think we do, maybe when we have kids we live through their dreams and live through supporting any goal they may have. I still don't really know what I want to be when I grow up, I have ideas and thoughts and dreams and in the face of everything, in the face of life, the true dream is, being able to dream at all. I hope she tries every single thing she wants to be, I hope she puts her gloves right back on after being defeated and I hope she never stops dreaming. She inspires me to be better, to be something. She makes me want to re-think my goals and I realize it's never to late too start over, its never to late too chase dreams. Chase that butterfly girl, I'll be behind you the entire way.

It's rainy, I have my pumpkin spice latte in hand and Adele on Pandora. Have a good week, friends!