New RE & Holiday hullabaloo

I set up an infertility consultation with a new RE for December 14th! A few things I'm excited about, THEY ACCEPT OUR INSURANCE, the DR is a dude and the practice is only 15 minutes from my work and with my tied to the office work schedule, this works out extremely well. I'm excited to hear their plan of attack and I swear to sweet baby Jesus if they want to do Clomid I will go all crazy infertile on them. To recap where I'm at: It's been two years of negative pregnancy tests. December will be one year since the miscarriage. I've been charting and seem to be ovulating, the previous RE wanted to bypass Clomid (as I've already done several unsuccessful rounds on this) and go straight to injections and IUI and then those assholes stopped taking our insurance. We are only covered for office visits and blood work but every little bit helps. I'm anxious to see how much an IUI procedure will cost at the new office. I'm hopeful and going in head high but grounded. Its the first step on a staircase of many steps but if you believe in fate, you fight for it. My gloves are on. "Without strength, there is no courage. Without pain, there is no joy. Without struggle, there is no triumph."

*****
The joke of "we should do Christmas dinner at Erik & Stacy's" turned into the real deal. I'm actually really excited to not unwrap presents in a quick fashion, get cleaned up, dressed and leave the house all before noon. It will be refreshing to sip my coffee until its gone, to lounge in my pj's until I absolutely must get dressed and to fill my house with family, food and the Christmas ambiance that comes with it this time of year. And the Glee Christmas CD playing in the background, of course. It also means 24 hours of A Christmas Story and that's a must. I mean I have a lot of organizing and a little planning and decorating to do but I love this shit. I'm even going to send out an e-vite because the Morrison side of the family is always last minute, no one ever knows what time or where anything is or what they're supposed to bring. It also gives me a chance to make these:

And these:

This site should come with a disclaimer noting that it will CONSUME YOUR LIFE. Its awesome. Its more awesome than awesome. It will rock your crafty world. Luckily now through the end of December is slow at work so I have pretty much 8 hours a day to browse.

*****

We've been trying to save money with the holiday coming up  and we really can't tell where we've been spending all of our money besides gas and groceries and my husband claims he buys nothing, he can't cut back anymore than he does, which happens to be mostly true, he really doesn't buy much. However, this is how the conversation went, husband: "where can you cut costs? How about not buying a bottle of wine anytime you go to the store?" Me: "Did you just hear yourself? THAT IS NOT AN OPTION." You know those moms who go insane, like drive into a lake insane or chop husbands penises off in their sleep insane? I'm assuming that's because their husbands tried to cut their wine allowance. I'll take that win, husband. Besides, I'm building up my cork collection and I do not think my $7 indulgence (or sanity in a glass) is breaking the bank. Also, he's never had to wake Lily up during the week, shits crazy. Also, I just bought a wine bar that will not fill itself. Also, I'm just a really big fan of it.

hide the knives, husband. HIDE THE GODDAMN KNIVES.

Maybe if everyone is caught up in the food, wine and Christmas high they won't notice our Charlie Brown tree. or that all the knives are missing.

I've got to make this life make sense

I'm thankful for the familiar things I know and for the things I'll never know. I'm thankful for my unanswered prayers, I know god has a bigger plan for me. For the raspy, silent laugh Lily does when she's laughing so hard, that the noise that comes with it just can't quite keep up. My girlfriends. You want to know how a girl survives? Look by her side. You ladies embrace my freak flag, you don't make me paint myself in black and white, or limit myself to a definition. You know I've got a few lose screws and you don't give a shit. My husband, who has shown me more about myself, than anyone. He's the toughest fighter I know. I aspire to be like him, his work ethic, his passion for family and his expectations of himself. When he loves, he loves hard and at times that leaves him vulnerable to being hurt but its never stopped him from loving. Always willing, to help, to love, to better himself. My family and how supportive they are, even in the worst of time. It's been a rough year and I've learned that if you ever need to figure out where you're going, start with where you've been and where you come from.
Being thankful comes in so many shapes and forms. For Lily, most of the time it comes in a "this is my best day!" and in that, I know she's thankful for that day, for whatever we did and who we are. For my husband and I, it usually comes in the same form. If we're excited about something or like the elements, we tend to say "that would be my best day!" Although the occasional "thank you" is nice to hear and is still important, its also important to look for the thankfulness that comes in the in-between. It's in the moments where a rake and fall leaves make the perfect jumping piles. It's at the table playing cards with dear friends, sipping wine and laughing until it actually hurts. It's watching a perfect little three year old stand in the shower with her eyes closed while the water runs down her and catching a glimpse of the beautiful woman she is going to be. It's carrying on the most important conversation about a play-doh picnic. The first fruit in the summer and the sky-pink hues in October that are as significant as the changing seasons. Letting the little 'help', which is mainly an egg stirred too fast and spilled or flour that has missed the bowl but letting her help anyway because she is willing, able and ready to learn. We tend to miss these moments, we get busy, our minds gets clouded, we lose sight of what's important. I'm thankful for the right now, the life as I'm in it at this exact moment, no more, no less.

Today is my eight year anniversary of keeper of the books. I stumbled upon this job a few months after graduating high school and who knew it would end up being such a perfect fit for me. I'm thankful to have such a steady job, that I like. I have a great relationship with my boss, my clients generally listen to me when I tell them they're spending too much and I've got a lot of 'wiggle' room. With taking things over and being an official business owner in the near future, I'm proud of this accomplishment. I'll drink to that tonight!

I'm going to surprise Lily and go to her Thanksgiving luncheon tomorrow. Work keeps me busier than I like, but with the little wiggle room I have, I'm making sure to make time for her, so she feels special, so she will always know that she comes first and will remember these times that we would do things, just for her, just because we love her. After all, she is my greatest accomplishment in life and though waking her in the mornings is much like waking the spawn of satan, she was heaven sent. I can't say it enough, she saved me from being everything I hate about myself. I'm most grateful that she's in my life and even more grateful to be her mom. Find a reason, every day, to be thankful. Toast to it, drink to it, say it to yourself, whatever it is you do, find a reason. Thankfulness and happiness go hand in hand and you are the only one who can make you happy. As you sit around your table, stuffing your faces with turkey and all the trimmings, take a minute and breathe in your surroundings. We know all to well that tomorrow isn't promised, so drink it the good stuff while you're living it.

Thank you, bloggy friends, for giving me an outlet to express myself, a way to cope with the emotional highs and lows of infertility and reading my stories on exploding pythons (of the non-penis sort). I'm able to put all that's in my head on paper and times when I don't believe in myself, you're always there to believe in me. You pretty much rock my world!

exploding pythons (and I don't mean penises!)

Baby showers are my kryptonite, especially the ones where no one knows my struggle. The mom-to-be at this particular shower is my husbands cousin. She hates being pregnant and I'm unsure she said anything positive about her whole pregnancy other than the fact that she loves eating cake for breakfast. She also prodded as to when we were going to have another and when "it's a long process for us" wasn't good enough, she came back all "you are going to have more, right?". I was nice on her and went all "we'd like to!". I should have been more "yeah, just as soon as my bitch of a cervix gets her shit together" Had I had more than one glass of wine on the way there, I'm sure it would have went more like that. act like you didn't know I needed as glass of wine before attempting said shower. And it occurred to me as I was watching swamp wars the other night and a giant python engulfed a freaking alligator like it was it's job, that's what I should have done. However, in this case the python exploded half way exposing the alligator, so the snake won in the beginning but got his, mid-snack. Lose/lose.

Karma, at its finest.

I have yet to make a consultation appointment with a new RE. I'm not exactly sure why I'm so apprehensive. I guess its the feeling of leaving the office as I did the last one, completely lost and overwhelmed. I know more than anything, I'm scared. We'll only have one shot one $2,000.00 shot mind you at this, because who knows when we'd be able to get together that kind of money to try again if this doesn't work. I mean, that is an option, the IUI not working. Sure, I'm hopeful that it will. I'm hopeful that the sperm they place right into my freaking uterus will do their job and and egg will attach and happy ending but lets be serious, this infertility shit keeps me grounded enough to know, that it might not work out like that. It might be awful and I might feel like that was my only chance for who knows how long and it just might be the last straw on this struggle that takes me to my knees. I believe I need to take the chance, invest my faith and be vulnerable to the opportunity, but that also means being vulnerable to the even greater hole this could leave in my heart. Everyone has their struggles, whether its health or family, marriage or infertility, we all fight for something. I mean look at the python for god's sake, he was fighting for food, he was hungry, saw that damn alligator and said "self, I'm gonna eat that big bitch for snack" I mean, it didn't really work out in the end but he saw that big ass alligator as no problem, just a little bump in the road and owned it. Until he exploded and all. Yes, I realize I'm reading WAY too much into the pythigator but it was totally appropriate for my post. Infertility is my alligator, I need to make it my bitch.

Also, I got my period (of course) last week, so we're onto cycle 25. CYCLE 25. Two years of negative pregnancy tests and heart breaks.  Also some more, two FB friends had babies,boys, on Monday. One of them complained every day of her pregnancy, I hope her baby has colic. Just kidding, sort of. The Duggar's also announced this week that loosey-goosey momma Duggar is three months pregnant with her 20th child, TWENTIETH! Seriously, world, do you want me to kill myself? I'm only kidding, I faint at the sight of my own blood. Besides, I bet babies pretty much just fall out of her vagina by now, and I'm pretty sure her uterus will one of these days. 20 kids will probably do that to ya, that's what you get for being greedy. Karma, Duggar, karma.

Basically, you can apply all of life to the pythigator.

pure awesomeness.

We attended both of our Halloween parties which by the way, I've come to the realization that I'm too old to dance in 4 inch heels for 6 hours. My legs, ankles and poor feet feel like I just ran a ten miler. If people start asking why I'm walking like an 80 year old, I'm pretty much going to tell them I ran a ten miler. I think it's equivalent and Lily rocked her bumble bee costume in her parade at school. We sat around the fire pit handing out candy to all the little creatures and handing the torch to the end of the year Holidays. Lily's "Dance little skeletons" and "Pumpkins on a gate" songs will be replaced with Pilgrims and sharing. Painted pine cones will decorate the kitchen table and radio will soon be filled with the hum of Christmas songs. Some people commemorate the day after Halloween as the first day to listen to Christmas music, I don't judge. Let your freak flag fly! With the holidays and all of the glorious calorific foods that come with them quickly approaching I need to start running again. Exercise is one of the easiest things to fall out of the routine of doing and also one of the hardest things to get back into. I love the way it makes me feel when I'm doing it, I love how much healthier I feel after doing it and yet still can't find the right amount of motivation to lace up the running shoes. Its hard, especially around the holidays, to find the time to take care of yourself. Its hard for a mom in general to find time for herself but to continue to be that good mom, its necessary to do these things. Pick the little up 30 minutes late so you can get the pedi you've been putting off, sit in the parking lot with your iced latte that you don't want to share, jamming to songs she can't listen to anymore because she repeats "boobies and droppin' it low". Make a coffee date with your friend for 30 minutes after work, you will never regret it. It doesn't make you a bad mom, it makes you a better one.

******
Grammy, has a facebook. FB is a great way to stay in touch with family, keep up with life and share your pictures without downloading only 6 per email because that's all that will fit. I even have my in laws on there and most of my aunts and cousins and such, however, they know that sometimes I fail to have a sensor. If you friend me and don't think my "Lily said boobies" or "Knock knock mother fucker" statuses are awesome, then I'm not certain where you went wrong in life or why we're friends because that's funny shit. I love my Grammy but I just don't think she's ready for me. Besides, 'friending' her is just a bridge to my mother who knows that I'm inappropriate and like wine just refuses to embrace it. Clearly, I'm far too awesome for her liking. I'm also not sure ho she'd feel about my recent status of Lily toppling over in her carseat because when my husband put it back in the car he didn't strap it down. Why, dear husband, would you just put the carseat in its appropriate place only to look like its strapped in? I drove around with her chillin' in her carseat all loosey-goosey for TWO days. Only reiterating the fact I'm not sure how the hospital let us bring home a kid! I made a sharp right turn into the gas station and she and her jet pack looking carseat attached to her rolled over onto the seat and then rolled between the back of the drivers seat and the back seat of the car. She was wedged there like a turtle who was helpless. I could not stop laughing, I'm sure no one else at the gas station thought it was comical, in fact I'm certain the ol' bitch next to me was was going to call child protective services. Lily is all freaked out with a deer in the headlights look on her face and I can't muster the energy to help her yet because I'm still laughing. I gain composure, help the girl out and strap the carseat down. Girlfriend doesn't forget stuff, so I made sure to tell her DADDY was the one who let this tragedy happen. I'll tell her this story when she's old and thinks being a bad parent is not letting her stay out past 10:00. I imagine it will go like this, "remember that one time Dad didn't strap your carseat in and you were all loosey-goosey in the backseat? Don't let that happen on your date tonight!" I'll put it as my status that day because it's awesome. I probably won't friend her on FB either.

scars, yeah, she's got her scars

The candlelight vigil for my dear friend was perfect. Faces glowing amongst the candles flickering, stories told, tears shed and laughter ensued. Together, united, we all stood around the gravesite in a circle remembering the life of someone who touched each of our hearts. It was a cold October evening but the unity, stories and ambiance of the candlelight could keep even the coldest soul, warm. Strength comes in numbers and it was proven that night. All problems are set aside, age is insignificant and we all come together in a pain we each share, to keep the memory alive and to help each other heal through tears, joy and hope. Its a beautiful thing, to be a able to turn pain, into pride.

*****

I've been better at temping this month and lo and behold, what is this you ask? CH's on my chart! It means I most likely ovulated this month, I hadn't thought I had been and I'm still not entirely convinced as the post-o temps are still fairly low, but even a light O, is better than no O. this life theory goes for both types of O's if you catch my drift! We did have a little baby making action around the time I received CH's, so who knows! I am in no way getting my hopes up, I know how this goes and my last few months have been wishy-washy with short LP's. Its nice to think though, that it would be a miracle to 'unexpectetly' get pregnant after two years of trying.

*******

It may have been the cold meds that I'm taking to kick this cold, but I just had the most random e-chat with a customer service rep from the Halloween shop I bought my costume from, its also proof that I’m not an adult but it was too awesome not to share!

Hi, My name is JASON, what can I help you with today?

Stacy: Really? Is your name really Jason?

JASON: Yes. Why do you ask?

Stacy: I just figure most people who do these 24 hour online service things are from like India or something. No offense if you are actually from India or something.

JASON: None taken. Is there something I can help you with?

Stacy: So…you are from India. Oh, yes. I ordered a costume last week and never received a shipment email and I need it by the 28^th. Oh, and I don’t have my order number.

JASON: What is the order name?

Stacy: Hannibal Lector

Stacy: Just kidding. I bet you get that a lot being a Halloween costume store and all. It’s actually Stacy Morrison.

JASON: One moment, while I retrieve your information.

JASON: We do have your order information, it was received on 10/20 and it looks like it was refunded the same day.

Stacy: I’m not sure why it was refunded, I never cancelled it?

JASON: It shows you should have received a notice via email about your credit card not being accepted.

Stacy: Are you judging me right now because my credit card was not accepted?

JASON: No ma’am.

Stacy: Because some jackwagon stole my credit card number last week and bought what I’m assuming was $300 in Redskins gear.

JASON: I’m sorry to hear of that.

Stacy: Anyway, I check my email daily and never got anything.

JASON: I’m sorry of that also, this is what was sent: *sends copy of email*

Stacy: So basically I need to reorder in hopes that I get it by Friday so I can win a costume party as Minnie Mouse?

JASON: I wish I had better news for you but it seems that is what you will need to do. We offer three day shipping for $8.99 that will get it to you by the 28^th.

Stacy: I mean, that’s pretty much my only option at this point.

JASON: Touche.

Stacy: Are you even real? I bet you’re a robot named Jason.

JASON: I can assure you, I’m not. Is there anything else I can do for you today Ms. Morrison?

Stacy: A real robot wouldn’t tell me he was a robot anyway.

JASON: Well, if there is nothing else I can do for you, thank you for ordering!

Stacy: I’m in an office all day by myself. I bet this is your best day having a conversation with Hannibal Lector!

JASON: Have a happy Halloween!

Stacy: Do they have classes that like, teach you to send nice responses to belligerent/awesome people? I’m pretty sure if I was you, I would like talking to people in the USA.

 --
JASON is no longer available

Asshole.

We've got a busy weekend planned, a costume party Friday, (which by the way I landed on Minnie Mouse this year and Lily stood her ground on bumble bee) and the pumpkin patch followed by carving on Saturday. Its going to be a crisp fall weekend, one that you'll need to come home from picking out the perfect pumpkin to making up some hot chocolate while you watch pumpkin seeds glow in the oven.

The memories have left you broken and the scars have never healed

You always remember what you were doing, who you were with and the moment that something life changing happens. It’s like the groundwork to who you become, the dots to which lines will be added to in life.

Before my husband proposed, my brother and I were waiting for him in my car and I opened the glove box for something and there a ring box was. I quickly shut the glove box knowing full well I wasn’t supposed to see it and my brother and I never spoke of it again. My husband had planned a whole trip up to the Shenandoah Mountains (to this day I’m unsure why as I’m the last person you want to take hiking anyway, I’m about as athletic as an overweight smoker) but it was raining that day and I put up a big fight about not wanting to go, after seeing the ring box I understood why he was so persistent about going. We didn’t go and he ended up asking me in my parent’s living room in the house I grew up in. He came in, turned the movie I was watching off and got down on one knee and asked me to marry him on that rainy September day. I had a hint it was coming since I stumbled upon it, but it didn’t make that moment any less special, the moment I knew who I wanted to grow old with. That house carries a lot of memories with it and was only appropriate it hold the one that would start the rest of my life.

The night we decided we were ready for a family. It was December 10^th; I had stopped taking birth control at the beginning of the month and knew we should start trying around the 14^th because ‘normal’ people ovulate around day 14 of your cycle. We lit candles and made it romantic for our very first night of actual baby-making sex, which is much different then the “pull and pray” we’d been practicing since high school. We figured we would have good news to share the next month or so, little did we know the long emotional road that lied ahead of us, the road that ended up making us stronger, the same road that led me to being a mom.

The day I found out I was pregnant, was actually quite a surprise. It had been a 16 month wait and late periods and negative pregnancy tests were common occurrences, on a monthly basis. It was a Friday morning in late August and I was getting ready for work, I had a few pregnancy tests left over from the previous month and realized I was about three days late and thought, what the hell, I’ll probably ruin my whole Friday but the desire to pee on a stick was much needed that morning. I peed, brushed my teeth and went to throw the test in the trash but on this particular morning, 16 months of disappointment and reoccurring one pink lines, there were TWO pink lines, two dark pink lines. I kept the secret all day long because I was sure I would go home and the lines wouldn’t be there but I busted out the big guns with the digital and there is no mistaking the word “pregnant”. To this day I can still feel the excitement in my soul.

The moment I laid eyes on my beautiful baby girl, is completely unexplainable. It was a long wait, a hard labor and all of the pain went away the second I saw her. The dim lights in the room, the family anxiously waiting in the sitting area and the looks of pure admiration from my husband are etched into my being. It was 9:04 at night and as exhausted as I was after the nurses went to their stations and our families had retreated for the night, I couldn’t make myself close my eyes because if this was actually a dream, I didn’t want to wake up from it. She is the answer to my dreams and this unbelievable amount of love I have in my heart, began with her.

Loss, we all experience it. From our first pet passing to an older grandparent, death is a part of life. I was always lucky enough to not have lost many people close to me. A few great grandparents when I was little and a couple grandparents as I got older, you hear of people losing close ones on the news all the time and I was always really naive to it because I had never experienced the loss of someone I was really close to. It was a beautiful October day, we had spent the day at the pumpkin patch picking out the perfect pumpkins to carve. My friend TJ and I had texted back and forth a few times laughing about the night before when we all went out for drinks, he was anxious about turning 21 in a few days, the last text he sent was “all hell will break loose when I’m 21!”. We went back to my brother in laws house for pizza and I had just heard that TJ was in an accident, so I called his mom and the only thing she said was “He’s not breathing Stac, he’s not breathing”. These words haunt me to this day. I sat down, I couldn’t eat and we were in a house full of people and I’m not sure I was even able to breathe for the next 23 minutes. They were transporting him to Mary Washington Trauma where my sister in law was a nurse at, she assured me how good the trauma team was and I reassured myself that he would be ok, they will fix him right up and we’ll go see him tomorrow. The next phone call I got was my brother on the other end, asking if I had heard, Yes, I’d heard about the accident but nothing since then. The next words I heard made my knees weak, “He’s gone”. The days following were a blur, we celebrated his birthday best we could at his parent’s house with all his friends, family, beer and cornole, just how he would have wanted it and his mom released 21 balloons at 9:00pm, when he was born. And he was laid to rest on the 28^th. With the one year mark being this Sunday, the 23rd, it stirs up all the pain, it stirs up all the emotions that came with not knowing the last hug or text was going to be the last one. The pain we try to subdue all year long seems to surface around this time, the pain that will always leave a dull ache in our hearts for the rest of our lives.  If there is anything anyone can learn from TJ, its he lived everyday like it was his last. He experienced life with a smile and went out riding on something he loved doing that his friend only gave him the chance to do, a street bike. I hate the sound of them, I can’t look at them but it made him happy and he died, while living. Smells, places and materials always tie us to people, they always will and through these things you’re able to heal, remember and relive. The memories though faded, will last forever and whether it’s landing your first real job, laughing over coffee with someone who will be your forever, gazing into the eyes of your baby for the first time or saying goodbye to someone on a cool fall day, these moments made you the person you are today. Breathe in each moment and never forget what, or who, made you. Reminiscing on these times, even the hard ones, will help even the most lost soul, find their way back home. Each person, each experience and every love in your life has impacted it, whether you know it or not. It’s ok to laugh, its ok to cry and its ok to hug a little harder when it’s a bad day. Utilize your friends, especially the ones whom you don’t have to say a word to, the ones that just know you need them. Embrace your family, in every conceivable manner, family is the link to our past and the bridge to our future. It is tied to places, events and history. With all these felt details, life etches itself into memory.


Miss you TJ, a little more everyday.

www.inlovingmemoryoftjmullins.weebly.com

 

when you're happy like a fool, let it take you over.

Retail therapy really is the best kind of therapy. I could go talk my heart out to a real therapist about the many a issue I have but damn if going and buying a new pair of hot heels doesn’t make me feel good. We went shopping and to a few wineries (yes, this is also fantastic therapy) with our friends on Monday and although I only came back with one shirt, the whole day was spent enjoying company and laughing, and laughter really is, the best medicine. We checked one winery off our list and moved onto the next, which happened to look like it was in the basement of a regular house, that is if you could get past the porta-john in the front yard. We were slightly frightened that we would knock on the door and an old man would yell to his ol’ lady to turn the TV off and get his pants. We decided to skip this one, since it was a sister winery to the first and shared same grapes, we didn’t really want to pay $7 to sit in a basement with father time scratching his balls while wiping the dust off the wine glasses and tasting the same shitty wine we tasted at the first place. I totally would have went in though, I love a good adventure and an even better story. On the way to our third winery of the day (we intended to hit four, we don’t mess around) we passed a smattering-of-shit-welded-together store. In the front yard was a giant metal rooster, if you haven’t read this story, read it and then the metal rooster sighting will blow your mind in awesomeness as it did mine. I have to have a giant metal rooster, I mean I guess I don’t need to go all crazy and get the giant, a little fella will do and it was only $80. My husband was not amused by my NEED for this rooster, nor could we fit it in my friends Mercedes but oh I will be going to back to get it, I will set it out on the hill behind my house, peeking out from the woods. I will be a great conversation piece. We all know I spend way too much time alone in my office, and as my own personal therapist I’m attributing my crazy chicken loving obsession to this. Just sayin.



That just happened.



I was on my way out of Lily’s classroom after I dropped her off for school and they had the parent-sign-up-to-bring-shit-to the class party board and I took a quick glace at who was bringing what and what they needed and you know what I picked? Pretzels. I’m the pretzel mom. Wtf. I know my baking abilities could be far better and I could have been cool and picked jello jigglers or even stepped out of the box and got a cool Halloween recipe or something but my hand wouldn’t stop me from writing her name beside freaking pretzels. I’m not a fan of being the pretzel mom, its Halloween, I could make any number of awesome things like witch fingers or whatever other creepy Halloween shit they have. Even worse, I signed up in pen. I don’t want to be the pretzel mom AND the crazy mom who scratches her kids name OFF of the pretzel list. Maybe I could totally redeem myself however by making the most awesome Halloween spaghetti brains those kids have ever seen. Too much? I’m pretty sure I’m over thinking the whole scenario seeing how chips and carrots also were taken; at least I’m not like the toilet paper mom or something. I’ll handle being pretzel mom this one time but I’ll kick the next parties ass.  You hear that Thanksgiving party? I’m coming for ya.

Have a glorious weekend, Friends!